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Dear All,
Passing of Wendy Boyd- 29 February 2004.
A Sunday occurring on the 29th of February will not occur for another 27 years. It is a sad day as I advise that Wendy passed away at 5.50 pm today, peacefully. I will advise of funeral details in the next 24 hours, but have suggested to our Minister Reverend Steve Everist that this coming Friday, 5 March 2004, may be appropriate. Depending on circumstances, this is likely to be at the Turramurra Uniting Church, 10 Turramurra Ave., Turramurra. I will be asking that in lieu of flowers, contributions are made to the Australian Scholarships Group for the future education of Emma (turning 7 years towards the end of March); Joshua (4 years) and Samuel (2 years). The children saw Wendy late today before she passed away. Wendy's parents Ev and Bev remain in transit, arriving at 9.40 pm tonight. Wendy's siblings Anthony and Evan will be arriving tomorrow morning.
Wendy was instrumental in the following yellow notice handed out with the local church bulletin:
"Welcome Home...
Many people entering church today will have seen the sign 'Welcome home....' at the entrance. They have probably asked "Who are we welcoming home?"
The sign came from a comment that Wendy Boyd made when she spoke at the 8.45 morning congregation some months ago. Wendy thanked the congregation for the support it is giving, in prayer and practical assistance to herself and the family, during her fight with cancer- a battle she is waging with enormous courage and an enduring faith that has inspired people in Turramurra and, via a wonderful prayer support network, around the world.
Wendy told of a convention she had recently attended where she heard of a church that had erected a sign with the message "Welcome Home." She found the message very meaningful, and said that this church has been, for her, a welcoming spiritual home throughout her illness.
A number of those who heard Wendy speak also thought the message was appropriate as an extension of the kind of church we would like to be- one that invites and welcomes, and embraces all in the saving love of Jesus Christ.
Hence the message at the door. And the welcome is for everyone.
"Come unto me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.""
I believe Wendy has been welcomed home into the kingdom of heaven with joy. She is at peace, and she has lived a life worth living.
With tears,
Graham for Wendy, Emma, Joshua and Samuel
Update - 29 February 2004
Dear All,
On Saturday night (28 February) Wendy, despite her discomfort, got out of bed and resting on the drip, foot on swollen foot slowly walked half the corridor before being urged in the nicest possible manner to turn by a concerned nurse, Pam, and I. Wendy flopped back into bed exhausted, having earned both Pam's and my admiration by displaying a will to fight not easily put asunder. Dr Gavin M. advised me this morning that Wendy is unlikely to go home. Her liver is close to shut down. Yet the epitome of that struggle to walk down that corridor last night, seen by few, is something worth mentioning- because it represents Wendy's life.
As I stand in Wendy's hospital room, surrounded by people with great concern both for Wendy and myself, I reflect on the mountain of healing. My eyes water as I find this a highly emotional time, as pressures exist from many sources, including work. If not for my relationship with God, I would be a gibbering mess. Because of my relationship with God, I find reserves that are without limit in terms of how far I may be pushed- indeed bent. My faith in God has not even been scratched.
I saw this mountain representing healing in its beauty some 2 years ago. Purple in vista, craggy and untamed, it is covered with unique flora and fauna. And as I have looked on, I began investigating the mountain. I sampled the soil, finding some which supported growth. I looked at the strata of rock, and found it comprised elements. I investigated the river flows and vegetation. I measured outcrops and width and depth- and now I stand back and realise I see the same beauty I saw 2 years ago. Nothing has changed. I have made one true finding. And that relates to the Spirit. The Spirit is central to all healing- It prompts prayers in relation to healing; the Holy Ghost knows the Will of God, reflecting the true character of a loving God; the Spirit knows healing is core to the Bible- a book describing healing between God and humanity from then until now, and just as relevant as now until then; the Helper knows how to heal, and when appropriate to His purpose it engages in healing, covering the spectrum between science to unfathomable action without explanation in human knowledge, just described as "miracle"; sometimes the science may be the miracle; sometimes the miracle is in what we do not see- forgiveness, yet it is more significant than physical issues; healing in various forms not limited by preconceptions of what should occur and when. God remains a God of healing and wholeness. Truths remain in understanding the understandings of the conversations between Job's friends and their arguments, based on knowledge that proved limiting- much from the perspective that God may be viewed as a process. God is not a process, although I know a lot of His loving character, which gives rise to thoughts that healing may be a process; healing is evident through the character of God. It is what He is about. If there were a better way for Wendy and I and His requirements, God would have provided such roads.
I look at the mountain, and seek the Father for intervention, for the Son to provide the path, and Spirit to act. Myopic vision must be tempered to His Will- and I welcomingly submit to such. The mountain is purple, and after much visitation to the mountain, it remains purple. I survey the mountain, and realise there is much and indeed even more that I do not know and will never know. But I know enough, and the mountain of healing remains beautiful in both what it represents, and is. Because the mountain points to God, just as the star that shone 2,000 years ago also pointed the way; to something very great- the kingdom of God. And entry is by choice. God's and ours. God has made His choice. The Spirit, the only continuity between all healing in its various forms and processes, tells us of His decision and then actions to allow us to have our choice. On the cusp of a doorway to something new, I rejoice that I know which choice Wendy has made- concurrently, I am saddened.
Seeking prayers inspired by the Spirit for the Spirit's guidance, intervention- and above all, processes and outcomes in line with His Will. I have sent a message for Ev and Bev to visit their daughter, and asked they travel with speed from Townsville in Queensland's far North.
Graham for Wendy, Emma, Joshua and Samuel
Update - 27 February 2004
Dear All,
Samuel is now known as extreme sports man or adventurer extraordinaire. He travelled on Wendy's bed on Friday morning as Wendy was transported from floor 6 to floor 3, then up and down a number of corridors to the ultrasound area. The new sport of hospital bed riding with Mummy may yet become an Olympic event! He loved going in the lift, and was proud to be with his Mum. Indeed, when he arrived at Wendy's room he became an instant hit with a number of the nurses as he ran up and down the oncology ward's corridor, proudly stating to all who would listen with a dimple smile that he had come to see his Mummy. Wendy underwent ultrasound, which guided the insertion of a needle to drain some of the excess fluid from the abdominal area. The main risk for this type of procedure is infection. The fluid retention resided in large pockets, and just over 2000 ml (i.e. 2 litres) was extracted. This has an equivalent weight of around 2 kilograms. The nurse let me sit in the corner of the ultra sound room and watch the procedure performed by the doctor, provided I did not get squeamish about needles. After what I have seen over the last 2 years, it was a walk in the park. For Wendy, it was something added to her resume of difficult experiences. I was surprised with the level of pressure behind the yellow liquid that allowed the liquid to escape. The flow was instantly evident when the needle was inserted. At some point I think I asked one too many questions, and I was kicked out to go and have a coffee. I was happy to oblige.
The yellow liquid extracted relates to ascites. Ascites is the presence of excess fluid in the peritoneal cavity. It is a common clinical finding with a wide range of causes, but develops most frequently as a part of the decompensation of previously asymptomatic chronic liver disease.
The treatment Wendy received today will probably have to be repeated at regular intervals. I do not know what these intervals will be. The reduction in pressure has allowed Wendy to breath more comfortably. As such, she does not need the oxygen tubes. Wendy's pain this evening seems far more "managed".
Of note, Wendy has moved rooms, again! She now resides in the most prestigious room in Oncology, with on suite, fridge, and decked out with many vases filled with flowers to compliment her new pyjamas. Room 649 is a dream for visitors like me- I will have to take up some munchies and a few bottles of soft drink for the visitors various.
Thankyou for much prayerful support. Two e-mail's, one from New York and the other from rural Bega in NSW sums up the journey from so many who have pledged support, much in prayer:
"Dearest Wendy, Do you have any idea how hard you make it for the rest of us mere mortals dear girl? How on earth can we ever complain about our lot in life with a clear conscience when you are out there fighting what I call "the Ultimate Battle" (sometimes I also call it "taking the Ultimate Challenge" although I think this means we had a choice which of course we didn't!). Wendy this is the type of tale of sheer will and strength that will be passed down through the generations for years to come. I would like to think that in 40 years time I will be telling my great grand child about this wonderful woman I know who lived not on food or water but on the will to be here for her family. I am positive that I am not alone here as all you need to do is look down your email list to see how many people have been captured by your spirit. Many of your tales make me smile. I especially enjoyed the one about remembering the leotard and shoes. I can remember myself lying on my side down in radiology at the SAN about to have a liver biopsy, saying to doctor to wait a minute because I wanted to tell Alex to not forget to ring a friend to bring some bright party shirts for the little boys to wear to the party tomorrow. It was the day before my birthday and I had decided to throw a party part way through my own battle! Wendy please know that although I don't write every day that you are with me every day as I am with you. Come and join me in remission so that we may thumb our noses at cancers ugly face. With love always, Meagan."
"Hi Graham, I've just read the latest and am trying to keep myself under control here at work....crying in the workplace is so not done. Wendy just amazes me with her strength, I doubt very much whether I could have coped with all she's been through....she is the gutsiest woman I've ever heard of. Give her my best and my child like simple prayers (the only ones I know) are being said now to help make the pain go away. Lots of love, Ann."
Child-like prayers that Wendy joins Meagan in remission from cancer appreciated.
Graham for Wendy, Emma, Joshua and Samuel
Update - 26 February 2004
Dear All,
Wendy is enjoying views of an atrium from her present room, being number 601. We are determined to visit every floor, apart from maternity, on our various sojourns to the San. We have been to this floor before on a few occasions, being the oncology ward. Before this all began, I did not even know what the word "oncology" before ward actually meant. With a crash cart and several nurses and a doctor at the ready, Wendy was tested yesterday with morphine and found that she could tolerate it. We have suspected this for some time, although the proof is in the pudding. As the anaesthetist pointed out to us when Wendy had the neurosurgery, codeine is converted in the body to morphine, and Wendy has been able to tolerate codeine. This is useful knowledge, as Wendy has been in extreme pain and the morphine along with fentanyl patches has proved a necessary combination. Even with such drug synergy, pain thresholds have proved intolerable and at various times today Wendy has not faired well.
The Xeloda appears to have worked, the extent uncertain. The oncologist, subject to confirmation from scans taken prior to the Xeloda treatment and just the other night, has formed the view that Wendy is correct when she thought the tumour in the left breast has decreased- and by a decent amount. His view is that the chemo should have worked across the entire body, hence, other good news may abound. However, the liver appears enlarged. Also, the Xeloda's foot and hand syndrome has worked in the gut. Unfortunately, it may be that ulcerations in the gut exist, although the CT scans and X rays indicate no perforations. This generates significant pain. A further problem is the dexamethasone and the fluids Wendy has been retaining, particularly around the stomach. This has swollen the abdominal area to the extend the upper organs are compressed, causing shortness of breadth. Wendy is on oxygen, and finds the oxygen tubes very irritating to her nose- particularly as her nose itches! The treatment with morphine for some reason assists with the severe toilet impulses that Wendy has been having. In a nutshell, it ain't very nice and Wendy is a little tired of it all! She has progressed from nil by mouth to a clear fluid diet. Apart from that, Wendy's jokes under the influence of morphine aren't very good!
The children are coping well, bonding very much with Jacky. Jacky has been marvellous, with her true qualities shining forth and positively influencing the children. Emma's 7th birthday is next month, and Emma has put in an order for a kitten (I wonder how Simba, our ginger giant British short hair cat will cope?). Wendy would like to oblige, and we will get a kitten 2 weeks after Emma's birthday. Why two weeks afterwards? Because Emma threw a tantrum knowing the consequence would be a two-week delay. Some liberal application of what constitutes "tantrum" has been applied, or else Emma would never see the kitten for years should each altercation result in a further 2-week delay! It has nevertheless been a useful bargaining tool, with the response of "think kitten" whenever Emma comes close to losing "it" causing wonderful calm in our 6 year old. Both Emma and Joshua saw Wendy today, while Samuel will see her tomorrow with Jacky. I told Wendy tonight that Samuel would visit, and through the various tubes, morphine haze, drips, antibiotics and the like, I suspect I saw a smile. Wendy has the habit of falling asleep when I talk to her- I guess my jokes might lose something in the translation as well?
Wendy's pain causes very child like prayer. Why so? Because it is hard to formulate ideas and create anything of oration when you are in real pain. You sort of get straight to the point. I observe pain, and am powerless to do a single thing about it- except offer child like prayers. No matter what, Wendy and I trust in God's Love. Love that ensures the epitome of utopia that existed at creation is again accessible through obliteration of sin- if we choose to accept the gift that allows reconciliation.
I can't say this week has been a picnic. We have half hopes in medical developments, and simply can only say, "Over to you God- Your Will be done". And His Will is not always clear. Most difficult.
On a somewhat positive note, when things occur slowly they are not newsworthy until one day you look and say, "that's interesting". Since the whole of brain radiation, Wendy's hair has acted much like Wendy- not giving up; fighting, sometimes against titanic odds. Wendy's hair, contrary to popular thought, has made a tremendous come back. Long way to go, but it has come a long way already. This really sums up our situation, should we have the privilege of further life. "Long way to go, but we have come a long way already."
Cheers,
Graham for Wendy, Emma, Joshua and Samuel
Update - 24 February 2004
Dear All,
My first task after coming home from work tonight was ordered within minutes. Objective: to find Wendy's slippers. Alas, I failed having found only one slipper. One slipper- and you would not believe how frustrating that is when you are in a hurry. One slipper found is where all similarities with Cinderella or anything remote to a fairy tale ended, as I took Wendy by fast paced pumpkin carriage to the San hospital, Wahroonga, where she now rests in room 1113b.
Wendy and I have spent another somewhat difficult time in Emergency, which was again very full, having our initial phase in the corridors. We scraped in before Emergency closed to ambulance, and finally ended up in bed 2. At least I now know the layout very well and managed to corner some ice within minutes. Wendy has been in extreme pain, particularly around the stomach. X rays were taken very late tonight around the stomach to see if any air pockets existed where they should not. After that, CT scans were conducted to check for perforations. It seems a training course was being conducted tonight at the hospital involving the CT people. When they were told Wendy was in they decided to stay back and do all that needed to be done to assist- that included attention by the chief radiographer (who happened to be in the hospital concurrently, although not on the course). The doctor in charge of Emergency reviewed Wendy's several centimetre thick file and summed up the evening by saying "you are a fighter". The nurse in the CT area told Wendy that she had stayed back when she heard Wendy was in, and sorry to "see you again under such circumstances. How are the children?" It seems she remembered and knew Wendy's name from a couple of years back. No untoward air pockets or perforations were identified.
Wendy's pain remained intolerable for much of the evening, although pethidine, when added to the normal pain management patches, eventually brought the pain to manageable levels. An amount of saline solution is now pulsing though Wendy's veins plus some specially named antibiotic, which at this early morning hour is very easy to forget- it was a long name! Unlike Cinderella, our fortunes improved at the midnight hour when we were transferred to the wards on Level 11. I could also tell Wendy was overcoming the pain, thanks to the pethidine, when she started telling me in a slurred dreary voice that I was to ensure Emma had a leotard, white socks, jazz shoes and water bottle for a dance class she is attending tomorrow (at least it was tomorrow when Wendy told me...very much today at the moment). Nothing brings home the fact that Wendy worries about life's little concerns when she tries to tell me what Emma is to wear as I sit by a hospital bed in Emergency taking in our somewhat adverse circumstances!
When I got home a few moments ago I was pleasantly surprised to find that someone had dropped around some pies they had made, and I appreciated the very practical support that I continue to receive during this time of difficulty. Throughout the night I was reminded again and again of so many practical people- from clothes being delivered to Emergency (with both slippers!); a doctor in emergency who took time out to leave the busy emergency ward to walk down to ensure the X rays and then CT scans went well; to the lady in CT who elected to stay back when she heard Wendy was in; to the chief radiologist who for whatever reason happened to be in the hospital and volunteered to assess Wendy's scan results; to the oncologist as he gave advice at the late hour over the phone to the doctor on the scene; to Wendy's concern about what Emma was going to wear for her dance class; to the person who cooked and then delivered the pies so I could have an early morning (really a very late dinner) "snack" when I came home a few moments ago. As James reminds me, faith without action is an equation that does not add up- one drives the other because of wanting to do things, not because you have to. Tonight, I saw people step out and say I want to help in practical ways- and they "said" this by their actions and concern as they very much ministered to our needs, where we were "at".
We do not know what the future holds. While pain (perhaps linked to the Xeloda's side effects plus the cancer's spread) causes significant anguish, and this was in no short supply for Wendy particularly in the earlier part of the night, I cannot say we were ever afraid. While the pain persists, it reinforces that Wendy's body and her ability to physically fight is not going well particularly as this evening Wendy experienced significant "break through" pain, despite the Durogesic (fentanyl) patches. Prayer as appropriate is greatly desired, and appreciated.
Cheers,
Graham for Wendy, Emma, Joshua and Samuel
Update - 21 February 2004
Dear All,
We are constantly reminded of how others think about us. At Bowral (Southern Highlands, NSW) last Wednesday, Helena M. told me "you cannot imagine how often we think of you, and pray for you and the family". Last Monday week I visited Dick S. in a hospital where he was dying of cancer, and during my brief encounter with him, his first words to me were "how is Wendy going?" Dick subsequently died early last week. On 13 February I met a lovely young lady, herself going through issues surrounding her terminally ill father, who less than a week after our meeting has been forced to face grief associated with her father's death from cancer. This lovely lady passed through me a possie of roses to Wendy, with words appropriate to our circumstance. Indeed the roses were so lovely, and as it was the day before Valentine's day, I had great temptation to issue them to Wendy from me! Needless to say, Wendy received these as well as a large sway of additional flowers via a "secret admirer" on that day which all men have come to characterise as somewhat commercial- but lo behold the wrath that may be encountered if a man doesn't do anything at least symbolising intrigue or subtle romance! Have I learnt the difficult way? Probably...
The Xeloda continues to take its toll on Wendy's feet (with lesser impact on her hands), and the feet swelling is noticeable and painful. One visiting nurse described Wendy's feet as "positively purple", and somewhat taken back by how Wendy's feet throb. The treatment must have some positive impact against the cancer, as Wendy is alive. Additionally, and this may be imagination and Wendy does not want to raise expectations not delivered upon, one of the large breast lumps appears that little smaller.
Prayer in anticipation of the radio stereo tactic surgery on 12 March 2004 is reminded. A prayer and fasting weekend called "splashing in the shallows" is being organised by the local church from 12 to 14 March. As it co-incides with the all day treatment at the Prince of Wales Hospital, and Wendy will need a few "support" days from me over the weekend 13 and 14 March, I will be unable to attend. At the end of this update is the outline of a sermon delivered last Sunday by the Reverend Steve Everist on healing. As Steve's healing theme sermons will continue over 3 or so weeks, culminating in a healing service on Sunday 21 March 2004, further material will be placed on Wendy's homepage as it develops. Prayer that may include revelations concerning the gifts of the Spirit at this special healing service would be appreciated. In particular, gifts of healing and indeed the presence of the "Helper" to heal is something for intercession. Without the Spirit of God the healing service would be mere "word fill". Words with authority are so important. Many times we speak words that have little or no impact. I am reminded of the group of men who lowered the paralysed man through the roof of someone's house (I ponder how the house owner reacted- hopefully he saw the miracle and not the new hole in the roof!) and Jesus' comment, "which is easier, to say your sins are forgiven or to heal?" The Spirit brought about a miracle, pointing not to the miracle, but to the first part of what Jesus was dealing with- forgiveness of sins; salvation, the "good news". Such miracles gave authority to Jesus' words as affirmed in Mark 2:10. Prayer to the Father through the Son for the Spirit to provide similar authority to the words that will be spoken at the special healing service is requested.
Our challenges remain real; although we have to say that relative quality of life, for the moment, persists. Wendy and I have been pushed out of our high nest again and again- facing challenge, at least three times over the last two years considered without physical life necessarily forming part of our equation. Yet as we have neared the bottom of each drop, we have sensed the Father eagle rescuing us by margins- we have been taught to fly in very stormy life weather, continually finding option four when we have realistically had three avenues. And our wings, in spite of base-jumping type vertigo and acceleration, seemingly against falls impossible to recover from over again, have taken on strength from what began as feeble but purposeful prayer flutters.
Our path has not been easy, or without cost. Some we have met or heard about on our journey with cancer have died. We are saddened, and like the shortest sentence in the bible, John 11: 35, "Jesus wept"- we have been impacted and have wept for others. Jesus wept because of the depth of love he felt for a friend who died. We take comfort from such emotion, for we relate to Jesus' display of humanity and compassion. In spite of occasional sadness, we find that God continues to lead us to lofty heights. Heights we would never have considered before our struggles with cancer. God has provided lift is his powerful wake. Lift essential to our upward spiral, as abilities remain youthful in our new domain. The Spirit's thermal updraft remains constant in the force of the prayers of many, with clouds of prayer nimbus forming islands between us and mountains of cancerous obstacle we overview. And as we observe one glimpse of reality not envisaged 2 years past, we see other eagles flying in the Father Eagle's lift wake, and feel renewed like the powerful imagery in Isaiah 40 that this journey is not by ourselves. Isaiah 40: 31 "but those who hope in the lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles,..." Like Isaiah, we soar on the wings of eagles. Members of our church in the fullest sense of that membership throughout the world have made challenges to the Father and been called to pray, supported in their eagle journey through the Spirit's updraft that remains constant and true. Our challenges remain, as does our need for prayer... and on many occasions, we have felt called to prayer in support of those who are in grief- for others who have faced and continue to face the enemy of cancer and its ally of death. For those who have lost their battle with cancer, we recall the words that Alexander Pope wrote centuries ago:
The world recedes; it disappears!
Heaven opens on my eyes! my ears
With sounds seraphic ring:
Lend, lend your wings! I mount! I fly!
O Grave! where is thy victory?
O Death! where is thy sting?
Alexander Pope could write such words as death has lost its sting, as Jesus gave healing beyond the physical- Jesus gave Himself so that we may be forgiven and reconciled to God, and the curse of death turned back with tidal force.
Cheers,
Graham for Wendy, Emma, Joshua and Samuel.
(www.wendyboyd.info)
Outline of the first sermon on healing by Reverend Steve Everist. Presented at the Turramurra Uniting Church, 8.45 am service, 10 Turramurra Ave., Turramurra on Sunday 15 February 2004.
Christian Healing:
The question of God's intention for our lives Part 1 - The biblical story Isaiah 35:1-6, Philippians 2:25-30, Mark 10:46-52
Does God encourage the expectation that he will heal us?
Old Testament -two streams:
1. Covenant discipline - Sickness and healing as a process of discipline involving the community as a whole. Exodus 4:11, Deuteronomy 32:39, Isaiah 45:7. Link between sickness and sin - Genesis 12:17, Exodus 9:8-10, Numbers 12:10, 2 Kings 5:26, 27. Isaiah 58:8, Jeremiah 17:14, 30:12-14
2. Mercy of God - Healing without sin in more individual cases. Job, Genesis 18:10, 1 Kings 17:17-23, 2 Kings 4:18-37, 5:14, Isaiah 35:5-6. Job argues against the disciplinary theory - points to forces apposed to God and to calamity in which sin is not a factor.
Conclusion. Healing is an aspect of Gods dealings with people. It is primarily contingent on the community being in right relationship with God but at times it is extended as a gift of grace to individuals within the community and to some outsiders.
New Testament - Jesus
1. Taking initiative. -Jesus takes initiative (Luke 7:14, 13:12, 22:51, John 5:6)
-Person takes initiative (Matthew 9:27, Mark1: 40, 5:6, Luke 17:13)
-Friends take initiative (Matthew 8:5, Mark 2:3, 5:23, John 4:47)
-Enemies try to trap Jesus (Luke 6:6,7, 14:1-3)
2. Jesus' motives -Compassion (Matthew 14:14, 20:34, Mark 1:41, Luke 7:13)
-Cry for help (Matthew 9:27, 15:22, Mark 10:46, Luke 17:13)
-Response to faith (Matthew 8:10, 15:28, Mark 2:5, 9:24, 10:52)
-Messianic (Matthew 8:16,17, 11:2-6, 12:15-21, Luke 7:18-23)
-Divine sign (John 4:54, 9:3, 11:4)
3. Jesus' methods -A word (Mark 1:25, 5:8, 9:25 Luke 4:35)
-A command to action (Mark 2:11, 3:5, Luke 17:14, John 5:8)
-Jesus' touch (Mark 6; 5, Luke 4:40, 22:51)
-Touching Jesus (Mark 3:10, 6:56, Luke 8:44)
-Word and touch (Matthew 8:3, 9; 29, Mark 1:41, Luke 8:54)
-Saliva (Mark 7:33,34 8:23-25, John 9:6-7)
-At a distance (Matthew 8:13, Mark 7:29, John 4:50)
4. Jesus' attitude -Some illness connected with sin (Mark2: 5, John 5:14)
-Not all calamities are about sin (Luke 13:2-5, John 9:3)
-Some illnesses are about evil powers (Mark 1; 25, 5:8, Luke
13:16)
5. Jesus' intentions -Jesus sends the disciples out on teaching missions to preach for his church and heal (Matthew 10:7,8, Luke 9:2, 10:9)
Matthew 28:19b, 20 - Did this include healing?
-Mark 16:9-20 seems to think so although there is some doubt
that this passage was originally in the Gospel
-Luke links the future ministries of the Apostles with healing
(Luke 24:44-49 and Acts 1:6-8)
-John pictures the disciples having an equivalent ministry to his
own (John 20:21-23)
Jesus' Church -Healing by word (Acts 9:34, 14:10, 16:18)
-Healing by touch (Acts 5:12, 14:3, 19:11, 28:8)
-Word and touch (Acts 3:1-10, 9:17-19)
-Resuscitation (Acts 20:9-12)
-Peters shadow (Acts 5:15) - Paul's clothes (Acts 19:12)
Some sickness too -Epaphroditus (Philippians 2:25-28) - Trophimus (2 Timothy 4:20)
-Timothy's stomach (1 Timothy 5:23) - Paul's thorn (2Cor.12:7-9)
Conclusion. Healing is a more significant aspect of Gods dealings with people in the New Testament. This change is clearly connected with the person and work of Jesus Christ. Jesus appears to connect believers more consistently with the healing power of God in a way that was not possible under the old covenant. Healing is portrayed as an aspect of Jesus saving power alongside the restoration of people from sin. Acts 10:37-38
We need to recognize that in Jesus' ministry healing was more than a sideshow drawing attention to his teaching it was an expression of divine character. Mark 1:44
It does appear that God has communicated to us an expectation that he will heal us.
However many questions still persist. Does the New Testament expectation about healing extend to us in this day and age? Will God heal us all the time? If not, under what circumstances? Are their recognisable circumstances in which God heals? Are there times when illness is part of God's plan? And much more. For some reflection on these questions you will need to come and listen next week.
Update - 10 February 2004
Dear All,
We feel that we fit the words echoed in 1971 by Malcolm Fraser- "Life is not meant to be easy."
Wendy saw the neurosurgeon this morning- he was armed with the November 2003 set of MRI pictures, as the last set of MRI's taken yesterday week have gone walkabout. Subject to the latest MRI's not showing dramatic difference to the November 2003 scans; the preferred manner forward is solely radio stereotactic surgery. The 4 small tumours are not large, and Wendy's balance problems, according to the neurosurgeon, probably have more in common with the "knocking" she has received from whole of brain radiation, neurosurgery and radio stereo tactic surgery. In other words, she has been through an awful lot and this has not assisted her equilibrium control area of the brain. The neurosurgeon considers his skills applicable should the tumours grow to a "later resort". Unlike the last time when we saw Dr Raymond C., compulsion for action does not exist in that the tumours are not causing pressure and are, for the moment at least, small- being ideal for radio stereo tactic applications. While the radio stereo tactic reminds me of the Spanish inquisition, once you get past the pins screwed into the skull and metal halo, the pain management concurrent with nice and professional personnel allows for highly effective results. It is also over relatively quickly with no substantial recovery time required. Wendy is a great proponent of radio stereo tactic versus neurosurgery, provided circumstances point in such a direction. Our neurosurgeon will discuss options with Dr Bob S., although he is certain neurosurgery should not form part of any program at this time. We will attack 2 of the 4 known tumours in prioritisation determined by Dr S., with the first prong of attack scheduled for Friday 12 March 2004. However, if there is another patient cancellation, we may get the radio stereo tactic surgery earlier.
The immediate relief for Wendy was apparent to me, and she became chatty when the neurosurgery option became dimmer and dimmer as the preferred way forward. I thought she was almost skipping when we left the office, with a wide brimmed smile. The tension, for a time, has been lifted.
My opening line for this update was "life is not meant to be easy". These words of Malcolm Fraser stood in his shadow for most of his political career in a negative form. Why do I say they seem relevant to us? Because of the context in which they should have been taken. A further quote from the former Australian Prime Minister elaborates on context: "I often said at the time, whether life is meant to be easy or not, for many people, many families, many kids it's not. But the whole quotation is rather different. It's the old man in George Bernard Shaw's Methuselah speaking and he says: 'Life is not meant to be easy, my child, but take courage, for it can be delightful.' " As has been our families theme for some time, it is not what is taken away that has been beneficial- it is what has been added to our journey that makes adversity "do-able"- to make it tolerable and, when we really appreciate life, to realise that life is both enjoyable and delightful. As part of this delight, yesterday alone saw Wendy pot two plants with the children (one Lime; the other a Bay tree- Samuel helped with the task of watering the finished products- a little dubious in efficiency); walked the children to Emma's school to pick up Emma, heard from Mrs R., Emma's teacher, about how well Emma is progressing; delighted in telling Joshua what a snow pea is and then organising a few for his dinner (although he did not eat them!); enjoying the wayward moments of Samuel as he baited his brothers and sisters, squealing in delight as he ran from his older siblings, having Mummy yell to the elder two to keep Samuel not only in sight but semi carolled captivity. As Wendy said to me, apart from the feet pain, she is able to do things that add to her positive vibes- and she feels good about life. Cancer is physically limiting, but this curse is in itself limited, and through the centre the spike of enjoyable life pierces to allow some things that will never be taken from us. And the centre of it all is the spiritual dimension that will a
We continue the fight for Wendy's health and life, with our quest that may be delightful even though life is not necessarily easy; with our vanguard for life including focus on defeating the foe of cancer. We may only do this successfully through prayer. Prayer to the Father, true purity of goodness- He who has absolute authority from before creation; prayer through the Son, Jesus: His free giving of Self in response to the Father's will paid the penalty reconciling humanity to true Life by Grace. And prayer inspired by the "Helper", the Spirit- the powerhouse of God to move things, beneficially altering ours and other's lives to change the meander of history through powerful Spirit intervention, with command and control of Holy forces. The headache for the cancerous enemy exists in that again, as per the many "again's" before; I am calling for prayer that makes a difference! Just one quoted e-mail from the many on the front who have chosen to both hold the line and take advancement through prayer: "...Yes, Love is the greatest force, and God's Love then is all powerful. We can only see the reverse of the tapestry that forms our earthly lives. We cannot see eternity. Sometimes we are granted a glimpse of eternity through the spiritual strength of people like you both. Our prayers are deep and constant, streaming heavenwards for the miracle of Wendy's complete recovery and for you all. On Tuesday morning know that many, many prayers will be streaming heavenward when you see the specialist."
Thanks for those prayers that speared heavenwards today, particularly this morning.
Cheers, with a skip as we remember that while life may be difficult, courage is provided when we live a life that may be delightful. Prayers of delight appreciated, and encouraged.
Graham for Wendy, Emma, Joshua and Samuel
Update - 4 February 2004
Dear All,
Emma, also known to the household as "Miss Moppet", recently shared a wishbone with Joshua. At breakfast the following day I managed to get a treasure out of Emma. She revealed to me by single syllables what she desired arising as her right from gaining the largest piece of that bone: "Mummy... gets... better". The heart wrench of this disclosure was short lived. Joshua, next to Emma and hearing Emma's desire, decided to chime, "and then we can go on a holiday!" Miss Moppet thumped the excitable 4-year old as he joyously contemplated a family venture to the Gold Coast. The strike was like why the 1914 World War began- it was probably attributable to a number of reasons- however, the major upset appeared to be Emma's instant assessment that Joshua's want for a holiday was far from her altruistic "wish" motivation. Naturally, World War did erupt, while Samuel just sat at his end of the bench, munching his rice bubbles, ensuring equal distribution between his mouth, bench top, floor and his stool- somewhat bemused at the love so expressed on the other end of the breakfast bench scene. I think the two elder children consider Samuel a minor power or else they would have sought his alliance with soggy rice bubble bombs, or similar, to tip the balance of force to one of the waring contenders. The skirmish ended with enforced kisses between siblings; and, for some reason, milk soaked rice bubbles abounded in the hair of all parties- including moi, a non-combatant.
We completed further MRI's at the Prince of Wales Hospital on Monday 2 February 2004. Thankyou for the many enquiries as to how the scans went. We will not know what the MRI's say until next Tuesday when we see the neurosurgeon, who will consult with Dr Bob S., who currently has Monday's images. I guess my concern (and that of Wendy) has been that the four again multiplies as the more detailed MRI's reveal further unpleasant tumour growths.
Wendy received the regular infusion of bone hardener yesterday, Tuesday 3 February 2004- now a mundane but nevertheless somewhat painful experience- the pain arising a day or so after infusion. Wendy thankfully commenced her 7-day respite from the Xeloda this morning. Even at the lower dosage, Wendy continues to experience significant discomfort in her feet when she walks. The more walking, the more Wendy becomes used to the pain. The problem comes when Wendy stops walking for a while, and then has to start again. I take a breadth whenever I observe Wendy putting her shoes on and seeing her grimace.
Yet, once going, Wendy is a miracle in action. She does things at a hundred miles per hour, and when speaking with Wendy, or enjoying a cup of tea with her, it is not possible to detect any problems. Her quality of life is currently very good, although her enthusiasm does see a major flake once or twice during the day.
Again, prayer for guidance is requested as we review unpalatable options- as they unfold- and see the neurosurgeon next Tuesday 9 February at 11.15 am. I ponder what the various specialist attitude's would have been had they known Wendy had 11 tumours (5 being removed by neurosurgery, and 2 by radio stereotactic surgery) when we saw them last year? It seems the 4 newly revealed sites would have been in existence, but around the July 2003 stage they were too small to be picked up with any certainty by MRI. This does not bode well for what else is currently hidden.
Unabated, much thermal prayer rises like vapour- racing, not seen, sometimes felt in its creation, always pins and needles in its outcome. Vapory prayer in country NSW forming bulging cumulus nimbus; vertically huge in depth, soaring through the troposphere and into the stratosphere; hundreds of kilometers in linear extent. Shifting, reflecting power and promise of Spirit rain where such rain is luxury as cancer's drought claims our domain. "As always you remain uppermost in our thoughts and prayers. I just do not know what to write about the new brain tumors. The news just intensified my prayers for you all. You are my first and last waking thought and prayer. I agree on the observation that in your story we can see glimpses of eternity. Remember that thousands and thousands of prayers are said for you all, all around the world at every hour of the day and night. Your prayer chain is like the British Empire; the sun never sets on it! Let me finish by telling you the simple prayer Henry (4yrs) says for Wendy each night. 'Please God, make Mrs. Boyd better so that she can play with her children like Mummy and Daddy play with me. Amen' ... Remember we love you all, and will continue to pray for you all, most especially for our darling Wendy." Prayers condense, providing nourishment in our country dominated by fearful cancer. Prayers of life rain falling, heavily, in parched areas long held by cancerous talons- and giving life where life would otherwise be devoid.
Life rain falling with strength, echoed by thunder and embellished by eddies of God's forked spears from cumulonimbus prayer: "I keenly read your generous updates Graham... Then when the impact has been absorbed I send it on to a friend at our last church. She then includes specific points for prayer for you all. I felt very sad when I read your latest mail, you thanked people for not forsaking you. This prompted me to write to tell you dear people that you & I will probably never in our wildest thoughts comprehend the number of prayers offered up to our Lord every day, all day & in the darkness & quiet of the night for you all. I was discussing you, Wendy, with my church friend, & we were in awe at the power of prayer, which is allowing this journey to come this far. So just when you don't hear from us, don't worry, we're praying all the way. I also felt very moved by the R.N. on duty who shared evidence of the presence of the Holy Spirit, loving, caring & inspiring peace in your room. Thankyou all for allowing us to share, not only in this journey for Wends' life, but also your family..."
Prayer provided Life rain, Spirit waters, combined to form streams that fill the Sprit's flow in powerful direction. A river moving throughout the many places where prayer arises. Torrents of prayer inspired Spirit movement on the Gold Coast, Queensland. "Your journey is and will always be the level in our lives. It's life in the real world where there is nothing plastic or false - I sometimes wonder how lucky some people are, as they go through life not experiencing any personal trauma or pain. Then I get back into the real world and know that the trauma and pain we experience is lessons we are learning in our journey... Never Ever Be Too Busy - always take the time to spend with someone, take the time to have a chat, take the time to phone a friend, take the time to visit, spend valuable and precious time with your family etc etc etc. Time costs you nothing but it is really our most priceless commodity. Each message I read from you reinforces the lessons we need to learn - all of which are - the simple things in life that are Free are the most Precious. Our thoughts and prayers are always with you guys..."
The rivers sourced from life prayer boom into a vast Spirit ocean, where we seek the Holy Spirit to movement of powerful action. We look to a vista of coastline with activity, of foaming Spirit wave crests gently embracing sandy shore where our footprints have been replaced by His who shoulders us through our troubles; and sometimes pluming high through confrontation with cancerous rocky obstacle. The waves of Spirit, able to comfort and accomplish incredible feats. We see our prayers, and the prayers of the many, in the foam and activity, in the vibrancies of movement, swells, backwash and feel the Spirit's wind on our faces. We smell God's sea-salt breadth, reminding us of analogy where saltiness has qualities that while pure provide preservation and things worth keeping through non-dilution of the Word. And overarching the activity remains the Son's light, transforming all that it falls upon. Our prayer scene is very much about salt and light. Prayers moving the Spirit to surround us, on that ocean shore, from a young Mum: "Just to let you know I have a prayer chain for Wendy via email friends. I have friends in Australia & the USA praying for her plus I send on your emails to Hillsong church. God has an amazing plan for Wendy's life but unfortunately the darkness of cancer has been thrown onto her by the enemy who doesn't want to see the plan unfold. Your emails are very touching & uplifting. You are more than survivors...you are conquerors!"
God's true strength does not reside in the froth of the Spirit's waves- it rests in the deep, deep, very deep blueness we sometimes miss when focusing on life's activities. The real depth of God resides behind and below our observed waves. The real substance of God is the deep love emanating from God. The Reverend Steve Everist reminded me that the quiet waters in Psalm 23:2 relate to the depth of the waters alongside which David rested. Quiet waters in many instances are very deep, not affected by surface issues- real power, deep power. King David appreciated quiet waters. Even the strongest storms in life's wind may only carve, briefly, the surface tension, and have no impact bar in the passing. The deepness remains, and quiet waters provide refreshment being waters of resting places.
We seek prayer to move the deep waters of the Holy Spirit, not just the surface tickle that causes loud sounds of turbulence; we seek God's movement that once begun may not be altered or stopped. Movement that will accomplish exciting and deliberate action to change the world in beneficially tangible ways- movement motivated by Love. Love reflective prayer from Margaret: "...I read your email this morning and my heart goes out to both you and Wendy. I cannot imagine the pain Wendy is in; she must be so uncomfortable. I really feel for you both and words cannot express my feelings but just know that you are both always in my thoughts and prayers."
Love that is both immovable yet movable- powerful when it is understood and awesome when inspired, such that mountains of obstacle shake with the power that may be brought to the rescue. Infinite Love that knows our very names; Love that is unafraid to take on death itself, knowing that it will conquer fear in any form. Love that allowed Paul to glimpse the eternity that this love envelopes- for it is God in His purest and most magnificent Self- a love that by self character must provide justice, hence payment of the cost; but that also provides God's own begotten. John 3:16 reminds that Love's Son's selfless desire provides a way back from any circumstance. What awful cost, as enacted in Mel Gibson's controversially graphic movie (see www.passion-movie.com)- a cost arising from the dreadful curse that was given when pride and rebellion found its way into humanities relationship with God. A love that C S Lewis in his "Narnia" children book series recounts as very ancient- older than anything else, by which life may be restored, through free choice. Love going before the beginning, stretching beyond the end. Love reflective from Linda, a young New Zealand mum: "...All the emails are so inspiring and again just show how much God is reaching out to others and changing lives through your suffering and steadfast faith ...As always you are all in our prayers." Love that is timeless, ancient, recounted in the wonderful words of 1 Corinthians Chapter 13. Created words which Wendy and I had as one of the readings at our wedding- both in the negative of what love is not, and in the positive of what love is about.
"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender by body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."
In my e-mail of 18 May 2002 I partly recounted a few stanzas's written by Linda J. I came across Linda's poetry a few days ago and thought I would reveal in full yet another of the treasures we have gathered on our journey with cancer. A treasure reflective of special things we continue to receive, irrespective of time or circumstances:
"When darkness threatens to tighten its hold
God's light seems to brighten in your eyes.
It's a mystery to me and yet
it is becoming something I anticipate.
We see God's radiance in your hope
Feel blessed in your presence
In your gentle spirit God has his channel,
Flowing freely, Him to me, through you.
It can't be easy being so special-
Just ask some other special ones.
Did Mary say No, too hard?
Did Paul say, No, too tired?
They, like Wendy, said:
"Then I will look to you in my journey.
You lead and I will follow.
Be my strength, for I am weak
Reveal your purposes as you choose."
God's tender heart speaks to your own
He rejoices in your trust, but not your pain
In your stillness He enters your being
Peace when you need it.
Rest when you tire
A future which is unimaginable
must become today's reality.... for now."
Wendy attended a special service led by the worship leader from Toronto Airport Christian Fellowship and his wife last Thursday night (29 January 2004)- being held at the Turramurra Uniting Church. At last Thursday's service, Wendy felt God's Love- and was deeply touched in particular by ten or so people whom, not having met Wendy before, told her that they have been in prayer for some time for Wendy's restoration and healing. The Love of God spoke through the fifth gospel, being the gospel of their lives lived through attitude. Love continues to be the basis upon which we ask for any miracle, and endure a reality of cancer that is difficult. Love essence that glowingly transpires to live within our being, so full that no fear of cancer may reside- so full that fear is cast out by Love's purity. Wendy has lived 18 months past a date that should have been her earthly Omega- a miracle in itself. Yet prayer is requested for a greater miracle, founded in God's Love. A miracle bounded only by imagination's limits. Between the Alpha and the Omega, between the beginning and the end, is an in-between: it is the living of life. For us, the more appropriate alphabet letters are those hardly mentioned, those between the two absolutes of the first and the last heart beats. We continue to request prayer to support us through life, to support us in-between Wendy's Alpha and Omega.
Cheers, remembering Beta; Gamma; Delta; Epsilon; Zeta; Eta; Theta; Iota; Kappa; Lambda; Mu; Nu; Xi; Omicron; Pi; Rho; Sigma; Tau; Upsilon; Phi; Chi; and Psi, those Greek letters between life's Alpha and Omega; those letters representing the process in living life... a process needing more than ever the greatest support of all- prayer, sanctioned in God's Love,
Graham for Wendy, Emma, Joshua and Samuel